Animal Instincts

by Phil

Last week, my friend Adam was telling me about how much his cats like playing with his shoes, particularly when he’s putting them on and the laces are flapping around. I passively remarked that my son also likes playing with shoes which quickly led to me realizing that my son has a lot in common with cats. They have many similar interests and hobbies.

Let’s start with the shoes. This kid loves playing with shoes for some reason. Here he is with mine.

He also has a few pairs of his own that he’s only worn once or twice before quickly growing out of them. Now they are chew toys.

While he likes shoelaces, he enjoys playing with anything string-like. This is a mighty strong preference. If he had his way, he’d be playing with and chewing on electrical cords all day long. He hasn’t yet learned the difference between the rope on his pull toys and the rubber-coated deliverers of electrical death.

I hadn’t realized how strong this attraction was until I started going through our photos looking for example images. The number was slightly overwhelming. So here are way too many examples of his string love.

The dragon pull toy given to him by his grandfather and uncle.

Another pull toy.

A little while ago, I put a pair of goggles on him, just to see how he’d react. He didn’t mind them at all but I think it’s because they came with the nifty sizing strap.

And, lastly, some extreme close-ups as he chews on the hand strap from our camera.

My first two examples being firmly supported, let’s move on to a few other activities. He likes playing with paper bags and cardboard boxes. I’ve never met a cat that could resist either of those two things. He still takes 2 to 3 naps a day and sleeps 10 to 12 hours at night. Collectively, that’s about 14 to 15 hours a day. While I’d like him to sleep longer so I can get more done, he still cat naps (what, too obvious and pun-like? Too bad, this is my post.)

He’s also intensely curious about strong light, wondering where it comes from and what it is. I’ve seen cats bat at bright light, but is it normal behavior for a baby?

The strongest and strangest correlation I’ve seen is the way he uses of my wife’s exercise foam roller. I promise you on all that I hold dear that my son utilizes that thing as a scratching post. He’ll sit there for long periods of time pushing it around the floor and scrapping his nails across it.

Perhaps we should be grateful that it’s around. If it wasn’t, maybe we’d have a shredded couch and drapes. Of course, the day he climbs the drapes using his nails, I’m calling a priest for an exorcism.

All of these individually are just cute baby antics. I am well-prepared to admit that all of this might even be normal behavior. With this being my first child, it’s the most time I’ve ever spent with a baby this young. Taken as a whole, though, in my mind, I’m afraid my child may have somehow been possessed by some sort of animal spirit. In a way it’s nice because I’m severely allergic to cats. So as long as my son stays in this phase, I have a child and pet all wrapped up in one sometimes cuddly, sometimes aloof little package.

While flying a few years ago, my wife and I sat next to an entertaining gentlemen that was telling us the many creative ways that he punished his children. These tactics actually included squirting his children with a water bottle when they were doing something that they shouldn’t have. It worked for his cats, why wouldn’t it work for his kids? He claimed to have quite a bit of success with the method. But don’t worry, I’m not ready to carry the correlation that far. I think the water bottle is a bit too dramatic. Unless, maybe, he starts climbing the drapes.